In the Hitchhiker’s
Guide to the Galaxy books by Douglas Adams,
Almighty God appears on another planet
and personally sends forth a
prophet to
spread His Word. The chosen one is devout and
charismatic.
And also bit
hard of hearing. In a few short years, people
all across the planet were hearing the sacred words
of Almighty Bob.
In a Monty
Python comedy about biblical times, people at
the back of a crowd were having trouble hearing the
"Sermon on the Mount", when one fellow at the
back says to the others, 'I THINK he said, "Blessed
are the Cheese Makers!'
Let's face
it, sometimes you can be too far away to hear what's
being said.
Many folks
(like me) have partial hearing loss.
What
do you do if you have more than 20 people
or
people with partial hearing loss at your wedding?
Simple.
A:) Find an officiant who can speak very loudly.
B:)
Find an officiant who can really yell.
C:)
Find an officiant with a PA system.
I am blessed
with a strong vioce and can speak, sing, or bellow
like a drill instructor when necessary. And I
have a battery operated PA system.
What
do you do if your site doesn't have power to plug things in?
A
& B Above OR
D:)
Find an officiant with a portable, battery operated PA system.
Did I mention
that I have a battery operated PA system?
It's a
portable, battery operated, high powered amp with
a quality multi range speaker for voice or music. At
15 watts, this unit is three times more powerful than
a pistol-grip bullhorn, but with far better sound.
I also have the two most used musical selections for
Weddings:"Here Comes the Bride" and
"The Wedding
March", on CD, and a small portable boombox if needed.
There is a
$20.00 fee if you need me to use my equipment
at a site with
power. This fee may be waived at my option.
There is a
$35.00 fee if you need me to use my equipment
at a site without
power. The equipment uses a LOT of batteries.
About
note about using portable equipment outdoors:
I do a lot
of camping and take my music with me. There are some conditions
when CD players just won't work. In my experience, this
is usually due to extreme humidity, and especially bad when there is heavy rain, dew or fog.
I will make
every effort to insure that all equipment is maintained
and in good working order when I leave my home, and
is transported safely. All batteries will be tested and/or replaced prior to your ceremony.
I cannot guarantee
the functionality of any equipment under open air (pavilions,
gazebos, etc.) and/or harsh conditions.
There is a
non-refundable $15.00 equipment setup fee included in the equipment fee. If for any reason my equipment fails to function, a refund of monies in excess of the setup fee shall be due.